True Romance

My darling, you are too lovely to ever truly be loved.

I’ve written about love before. Not that I actually know anything about it, hee hee! It seems like life is one big love triangle because we always expect something in return. We want those things we love for ourselves. Isn’t this what pushes everything away in the end? Possession and control. But everything in nature can only be absorbed. You don’t find things, they come to you. That’s where opportunity strikes. As they say in Taijiquan: “let the thief into the house”.

Nearly everyone experiences at one time or another the illusions of a romantic fantasy, the embellishment of another person in their mind; a person who is either not reciprocal in their affections or does not actually exist the way one imagines them to be. And many people become lost or jaded when they discover that their internal notion of romantic love was largely a fantasy.

But some other people find this realization to be liberating. For how could life be any other way? It’s easy to speculate upon the world, or how things might be, but it’s impractical. That is, an untamed and emotional imagination is not going to shape the world in its own image. The world will chew it up and make it sick or complicated.

Imagination is very important in all walks of life. Life itself is imagined into being on some level; physical and emotional reality is like the untamed “fungus” in the universal cosmos. Life is a potent dream that we are living. But to make our individual dreams become real, we have to project our entire efforts into living, not more dreaming (personally I still struggle with this conundrum).

I once saw a pretty good debate between a priest and a Satanist. The priest posited that the astral realm is only problematic in that a lot of occult groups stress too much emphasis on acting within it. But when people resolve themselves to act only in the astral realm and begin to ignore the importance of consistency and willpower in daily life, they begin to live in a fantasy world. Astral projection can become like playing World of Warcraft every day and ignoring the obligations of daily life. These people become hippies, New Agers, and so forth.

Both Taijiquan and Budo Taijutsu (and probably other arts) use the Chinese character for perseverance as their symbol. The art of perseverance is the only thing necessary to survive in the universe or succeed at any thing. To live on your own terms or create the world you wish to live in, you have to embody perseverance. As one walks down this path, the things in life that once seemed so difficult are mere trifles. The hardships of daily life becomes one’s training ground, one’s partner.

As everyone in the universe will tell you: hard work is what counts. Even if you don’t have any talent, hard work will save you in the end. Hard work is what gains recognition and the trust of others. A person with talent is nothing without ability and a person with ability is nothing without hard work.

The hardest work of all is loving someone for who they are, selflessly. Love without expectations! I’ve heard that extra-marital affairs are not frowned upon in French society and furthermore, in some traditions with fixed marriages, a passionate affair can be a holy or positive event. Even love has different faces, it would seem. But those passionate love affairs burn out, don’t they? So how can they be any kind of true love? They are more like obsessions.

Perhaps the best exposition on love ever put to film is the 1945 French movie, Les Enfants du Paradis. Only a fool would miss that one!


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